Blood pressure

My sister has gotten herself into a mess. Sometimes, as we were growing up, it felt like she could fall into a 100 thorny rose bushes and come out without a scratch but then at other times she would  trip on an invisible crack in the sidewalk and barely recover. This time she did not fair well. She ended up in a dark and lonely place. Her mind, heart and spirit are broken. I haven’t seen her since Christmas 2 years ago. I miss her.

She sent me a letter today. She started with an inside joke only I would get, an old joke from an episode of Laverne and Shirley from when we were kids. Then she offers me words of encouragement and advice. It isn’t bad advice, but I’d never admit that to my little sister. She ended with information about how things are going for her. Its hilarious and I am going to share it here:

“Well, I am working on getting into the boot camp that starts in June. But wait till you hear this... I have to take a physical for it. This nurse went to take my blood pressure and it was really high (I knew it would be because I just came from my shrink and was a wreck). She put the cuff on (of course, she is like 5'5 not even 100 lbs) and the thing flew off and hit her in the face because of my fat lunch lady arms. The doc couldn't stop laughing after he saw that she was ok and didn’t have a flesh wound. I’m like ready to die. Needless to say they are going to call me back when they have the bigger cuff for fat ladies... “

Observations from the back seat

When I was about 13, I remember being over at my Grandparents for a celebration. As we were all leaving (My family and my mother’s brother’s family) David, my 16 year-old cousin got into the driver’s seat. He always seemed so old to me while we were growing up because he was 3 years older so that usually put him into the school just above where I was (jr high when I was still in elementary, high school when I finally made it to jr. high, etc.)

So I watched in awe as we all got into our cars and he got into the driver’s seat. Not only did he get to drive, but my other cousin, Kim, who was only one year older than me got into the passenger seat and my aunt and uncle got into the back seat! At the time, this was very amazing to me.  This never happened in my family. I made the request a few years later once I got my license but both parents gave a resounding no to the idea of me and either of my sisters in the front seat while they sat in the back. Oh well, I tried.

Last night, after a dinner with all 8 of us, the guys took the boys to their house and the girls came home with us. Macy asked if she could drive. I could not say no. The cool awesomeness I remembered my uncle being would finally be mine! Not only did I let Macy, our 17 year old drive, but I had Pepper sit in the back with me and had Dori ride in the front passenger seat.

Here’s what I learned: Pepper was not happy with this suggestion to sit in the back. The door handle in Dill’s spot has something sticky on it. Dori, in charge of the radio, does not like the same kinds of music I do. The speakers in the back are much louder from Dill’s spot. You can not see over the driver’s seat from his spot so I had no idea when turns, bumps, ramps, passing cars, stop lights…. were coming up. Macy likes to “shimmy” the ever-slightest bit like a race car driver as she tools along the highway. From the clothes hook above my head, Dill long ago tied a balloon. The string left behind is long enough to hit my forehead. There is no lumbar support in the back seats of our SUV. I still get car sick in the backseat. My parents were much smarter than my uncle. :)

Power Outage

A big storm rolled through our area recently dumping quite a bit of snow and knocking out power all over. We did not actually lose power when everyone else did, ours was mostly a brown out. We had dim lights, use of the stove, but not the microwave or oven and couldn’t use our pellet stove or TV. We were all home together for a snow day. The kids played games and we all read and hung out. At the end of the day, Dill announced, “Hey, we got through the whole day without technology!” I think he felt like Laura Ingalls!

This reminded me of the first time I ever lived through a power outage. My family lived in Cleveland and I wasn’t more than 3 or 4. It was a big summer storm that knocked out power all over. Our whole neighborhood was without power. On day 2 of the outage, my Dad talked to the neighbor because they were both worried about losing everything in the freezer. They decided to get out their grills and just cook everything. Other neighbors joined in and it became a huge neighborhood party. The outage did not affect us too much since it was summer and when it got dark, everyone just went to bed. On about the 4^th day, Mom was ready to do some laundry and was again talking to some neighbors about how long they would be without power. It suddenly occurred to my mother that the electric company should have given an estimate on how long the outage would last. She asked who had called to notify the company that the power was out and all the neighbors looked at each other and then started laughing when they realized no one had called because they assumed someone else had! Mom called and was told the power would be turned back on within the hour. J

Weekend at Waterpark

We went to a waterpark to celebrate a long weekend off school. We met Jay and Lexi, and lots of members from their family, Dad B &D and my sister L and her family. It was nice because pretty much everywhere we went we saw familiar faces. We had the option of taking a shuttle over to the casino but instead decided to stay at the waterpark hotel and play card games without losing our shirt!

                      

We took these pictures and I realized that in the distant future this would be my idea of heaven. Friends and family relaxing together, laughing and playing games.

On the way home we even stopped to take Dori out to lunch!

It was a very nice short vacation. :)

Energy Crisis

As a child I thought the energy crisis had been invented by crazy parents like my Dad who would wander around the house yelling out numbers as he counted how many lights had been left on in the rooms no one was in. (Its horrible because now as an adult I often wander around my own house counting how many lights my kids leave on after they leave a room!)

I long ago proved that the energy crisis was made up. There were commercials on TV when I was 6 or 7 that told kids that to help with the energy crisis we should turn off the water while we brushed our teeth. The announcer told us that there was a water shortage and we needed to do our part to help save water. Pa-leeze! There was no water shortage! .... I really doubted that were true- so one day I turned on the bathroom faucet full blast then went off to watch episodes of Sesame Street, Electric Company and Captain Kangaroo. I came back into the bathroom and the water was still pouring out!!  Since we lived in a city and we paid by how much we consumed.... all I can say now is: my poor Dad!!   :)

Oh no... "Star-get"

Two of Pepper's biggest expenditures and addictions are the store: Target and the coffee house: Starbucks. I was just in a local Target today and saw this sign! Oy, our bank account is in trouble! To make things worse, the store is almost on our way home from work..... and Pepper loves a "long cut" (the opposite of a short cut!)

Dish Duty

I think Dill often says very eloquent things when he speaks (especially for an 11 year old). For instance, tonight as we were driving, he was talking about some candy he still had left over from Christmas. He said, “No one can really capture the essence of the banana flavor in candy" This phrase tickled me and I made a point to remember it.

However this morning I was less than amused when, as I was picking up Pepper and my breakfast dishes from the table he said to me, “Be a dear and take away my dishes too” That earned him dish washing duty! J

swim blonde

Pete is on the high school swim team..... and that means goin' blonde! At the beginning of the season all the boys dye their hair blonde then just before the last big meet they shave their whole head and possibly other body parts too..... since Pete is a freshmen we aren't exactly sure how involved that gets, but we will find out soon! Its hard to believe how fast this guy is growing up. It seems like just yesterday we were waiting for the kindergarten bus and taking off the training wheels-- now my boy and I can share a L'Oreal Excellence superior grey coverage hair color bottle. Dang, time sure does fly!!  :)

Lookin' Good!

Here is our latest family portrait taken by a friend at church. Hard to believe how big the kids are getting! I remember taking our first church picture... they were all a whole lot shorter!! :)

Stuffed Green Peppers

My father’s favorite dinner was stuffed green peppers. I hate the taste, smell and look of green peppers. Always have, always will. As an adult now, recalling what the Green Peppers looked like and how she made them… I think it was a very well prepared dish.  Meaning she made it well. I may have some day grown to like green peppers but my parents always insisted that I had to eat the insides of the green pepper and could skip eating the actual pepper before I could leave the table. The problem was that the green pepper taste permeated the whole dish. The meat and the rice and everything else inside the green pepper tasted like green pepper!  I pretty much chocked, gagged and held my nose through the ordeal every time she made it.

Even now I do not like the taste of peppers. If I see them whole… I don’t like red or yellow ones either.  It amazes me how smells can bring back vivid old memories…. Even walking through a farmers market where there are bins of green peppers I have to resist the urge to plug my nose and yell “Yuck!”

Büƒ

November brings to my mind… food. So this month I’m going to blog about food. Dishes and meals from my childhood and adulthood that have become traditions or fond memories.

The first is reaching way, way back… to a dish called Büƒ. My Grandmother made this dish for me when I was a kid. It was my favorite thing she made. Now, a couple important details about this…. I liked very PLAIN food as a kid. In fact in college Jay gave me Big Red chewing gum for the first time and I thought I was going to die! The other fact is that my Grandmother (GG) was not a very good cook. She tried, but I don’t think it was an interest to her.

So,  Büƒ is made from ground hamburger made into fat, little patties and pan fried in onions. GG always tasted the raw meat before she bought it at the store. Many, many cashiers gave her funny looks when the package came by with a hunk missing. They told her she’d get botchelism or worms…. I am pretty sure she outlived them all. 

After the patties are cooked Grandma would make gravy with flour and cold water added to the drippings. She served the patties and gravy over potatoes that were whipped. She told me that when she was a child this was served over mashed potatoes (same as whipped but no butter or milk added to “cream” them up) but she liked whipped much better so that’s how she made them now.

I have tried to make this dish many times and it never turns out as good as when my grandmother made it for me. The times she made it were on special over night visits when I was the only grandchild that visited. A few times in high school and while I was in college I would drive over to her house and spend the evening with her and my grandfather and she’d always have this dish ready when I’d get there.  It was always fabulous. Maybe it was because she tasted that raw meat in the store and knew it was fresh and tasty. J

Dinner with Dori

I went to spend the afternoon with Dori and saw all these bikes outside her dorm. There were more along the other side of the walkway too! We actually drove around town (rather than ride the bikes) and had a nice dinner. We passed a huge playground and park at one point and I asked her if she wanted me to pull over so we could try it out. She laughed... but 10 years ago she would have been thrilled. They grow up so fast!

Bicentennial Collection

In 1976 my Mom started collecting bicentennial quarters. There were many around and my Mom thought they would some day go up in value. They were easy to spot and her collection grew quickly. By 1980, she had A LOT of them. So many that she used them as a down payment on a built-in swimming pool for our back yard.

After the pool was built, Mom started collecting bicentennial quarters again. It was hard not to. Every time one of us in the family would get change we'd check our quarters and Mom would trade us for non-bicentennials that we would spend. They were getting a little harder to find by then, but Mom's collection quickly started to grow again.

When Mom died in 1999, my sisters and I split the quarters up and each took a third. It was still quite a few quarters. I put mine in a dresser drawer and figured I would just save them, maybe someday they would be worth more like my mom always hoped. Every once in a while I would get them out of the drawer and let the kids count them or stack them up into tall piles. I pretty much forgot about them, but Macy remembered them one morning when she was in 3rd grade and her lunch account at school was getting low. She had lunch money, but really wanted more for the extra treat line that had candy and chips.

She took a large plastic bag, filled it with the quarters and stuck it in her backpack on her way out the door. When I found out about a week later (due to all the candy and chip wrappers I found in her room and backpack) I was more angry that the lunch lady took the quarters without questioning where they had come from then I was that they were gone.

At the time, I told Macy I was disappointed with her and that I wished she hadn't taken them. That they were from my mother and she had no business going through my room and dresser. She was having lots of behavior issues at the time and I really did not think what I said made much of an impact.

A few months ago, I came home and Macy was sitting on the living room floor with a bunch of coins. She scooped them up and gave them to me. She told me she was collecting them while she was at work. Whenever someone brought in a bicentennial quarter, Macy would trade it with quarters she had and then save the bicentennials. Apparently, from the pile she had collected, she had been doing this for quite awhile.

She still collects them. Every once in awhile Macy will hand me 2-3 coins and say nothing. I say thank you and put them into my dresser again.  Sometimes I wonder if any of the coins are the same ones that my mother collected so many years ago... I guess I will never know. What I do know is that the tradition of collecting these coins has now crossed three generations and my daughter.... who really never got to know my mother- now has a connection to her. Bicentennial quarters always remind me of my mother, and now they will always remind Macy of me. That fact alone means Mom was right....those coins have definitely grown in value. :)

Happy birthday Pepper!

I've been thinking a lot about your birthday.

This is the 27th birthday I've spent knowing you, and I would love to get you all the things I know you dream of having.... I'd buy those new floors for the house that I know you keep wishing for. A landscaper to beautify the yard and a housekeeper to keep the inside spic and span. We'd travel- we'd see Europe and spend lots of time in Germany and Malta. I'd buy you a new wardrobe and hire a personal trainer and Ellen's chef so we'd make healthier choices and get as fit as we (ok, never) were!

I'd wine and dine you and take our family to new places and explore things we've never seen before (all from 5 star hotels!) I'd get you a $10,000 gift card to Barnes and Noble and a $20,000 one to both Starbuck's and Target because I know that it is you that keeps them all from going out of business.

I'm grateful for you everyday. I know I can't get you all the things you dream about- but I promise to wake up beside you every morning for as long as you will have me. I love you. Happy birthday Pepper. :)

Consequences

Today I went to the funeral of a co-workers daughter. I’ve been thinking about her a lot since I heard her 20 year-old daughter died in a car accident Saturday. For instance, just over a year ago, Dori was in a motorcycle accident that could have ended much worse than it did. Last weekend, Macy and Pete drove to a church event and sent a text when they arrived safely as we agreed. Dill went with friends this weekend climbing trees to set up a hunting stand 15 feet up a tree.

Last Sunday, while we were enjoying a family dinner with B&D then Skyping with Dori…. this co-worker was planning her daughter’s funeral. It’s hard to let children grow up and become more independent and make their own mistakes. Some consequences are just too huge…. Too permanent.

Macy had some friends at her swim meet tonight. They are a young couple from our church with three young children. I watched the Mom hold one of the kids hand as they walked up the stairs to keep him from falling and the Dad put his hand on the back of another one’s head when he almost bumped a railing. After they left, Macy asked Pepper and I if we missed having young kids. I thought about how much easier it is to keep them safe when they are always in sight. I thought about a commercial for toilet tissue I once saw on TV where a Mom wraps her child in toilet paper before allowing him to get on a bike. At the time, I thought the commercial was ridiculous…. But now, I can see the desire to keep growing kids safe. 

Today, another person at the funeral shook her head and whispered to me when she saw the co-worker barely holding it together: “There but for the grace of God go I” she said. Pepper mentioned later that I always seem to know what to say to people in these situations (like funerals and hospital visits) and it surprised me, because I always just say what I feel. When the co-worker hugged me and thanked me for coming I simply said, “No one should ever have to bury their child. I am so sorry you have to do this.”

“If you were my child, I would staple you to your bedroom wall.”

 ~Myra McEntire, Hourglass

Yard Work

The boys were willing to help me work in the yard. Pete started with trimming the out-of-control bushes....

Dill climbed up onto the roof and started working on the gutters....

September is definitely time to get down that last stubborn string of Christmas lights!

Both brothers working together makes a Mom very happy!

Thanks guys.... now lets go watch some football!! :)

The Clean House

Following a Saturday morning of full tilt cleaning by everyone.....

Dill: Wow.... Our house is so clean!

Pepper: Yes, wouldn't it be nice if we all kept the house clean all the time?!!

Pete: Naw, then we'd have nothing to do the day before Nana came over.

:)

The Baby Dream

Last night I dreamed that we had a baby. This is a surprise to me on a couple different levels. First, I never remember my dreams and this one was vivid. My whole family was there waiting to meet my new baby. We were at my Uncle Jerry and Aunt Sue’s house. Everyone from our old annual family clambake was there. My grandmother who recently died and my grandfather who died 20 years ago were there with matching blue and white striped shirts on that said “Mexican Hotel” .  I have no idea why their shirts would say that but in the dream I did not think to ask. Aunts and uncles and cousins I haven’t seen in years were all hanging out at the house and looked happy ~none of them aged a bit.

The baby itself was quite a surprise. Besides the fact that I wasn’t trying to have a baby and am at this point to old take on such a huge endeavor....she talked to me on the way out of the hospital! I am holding her as we were going down in the elevator, she was quiet so only I seemed to hear her but she said the numbers that lit up as we headed down. “Seven, six, five, four, three, two, one…. Bye, bye”  Then as we walked to the car she was telling me that she was very excited to meet the rest of the family. When we got to the car I sat down in the backseat and explained to her that I was a speech therapist so I knew that she should not be talking yet. She was just too young. She rolled her eyes at me like the most skilled teenager and told me the car seat I was putting her into was just too ‘strappy’. Yeah…. we’re so done having kids.

Family Pictures

I love group pictures of our whole family together… but here is some advice from Dad B. I always try to keep this in mind especially since cameras are easy to lose:

~Always find someone to take your picture that you can outrun! :)

Chinese dinner

We were eating chinese food for dinner the other night and everyone was trying each other's dishes. Dill tried some of Dori's dish. He made a very quizzical face and said, "This tastes familiar but I can't put my tongue on it." :)