Too young....

I remember being 16. Maybe that is why having a daughter that age is so scary! I'm not saying I was a horrible teenager.... but I definitely wasn't perfect. Dori is actually a very good kid... mostly. She has enough attitude for 10 people and is NEVER wrong! Our biggest problem is she is too courageous and smart.... great qualities for an adult, not so for an "its all about me" teen. In the last day or so lots of things have happened that make me realize that she really is growing up fast.

Yesterday in her facebook profile she wrote that she really loves her boyfriend Ned. I have told her since her first boyfriend (in fifth grade) that I did not want any thoughts of sex until she was dating the same person for over a year. Now I am wondering how long she has considered herself dating Ned. She has known him for a couple years now because our families go to the same church. I don't think they've actually been dating more than a few months. I am torn between staying quiet and wondering how long they've been dating and risking reminding her how close to the 'year mark' she may be! 

This morning she asked about going to the movies with friends... including Ned. Pepper asked how she would get home. (We will be near the theater when she needs to get there, so I had already told her I'd take her) She made a few calls and said one of her friends (also 16) said he would give her a ride home. Hmmm... I just don't trust any 16 year old driver, but I really do trust Dori and we did tell her to problem solve... and she did. I do need to cut the apron string at some point, don't I? I was just harassing Skip this morning for still helping her son (also 16) make his bed. This age is so hard!! They are little kids one day and grown ups the next!! Now she just said that the rest of the group are going ice skating but she and Ned still just want to go to the movies. Two lovebirds alone in the dark theater... no wonder I am going grey so fast!

Work is going to be a big issue soon too. She wants a car. She wants more independence. We want that for her too... but planning for summer this year will be hard. I want her to go camping with the family. Its hard to plan our trips knowing Dori may have a demanding work schedule to deal with. Plus there is the whole Ned issue. Do we let him come with us? How close will we be to that damn year mark then?!

There is a glimmer of hope for our maturing Dori. Yesterday she asked if she could stay after school on Monday and just hang with friends until she had to work at the pool (she teaches swim lessons 4 hours per week). I told her we needed her home to meet the boys bus because Kiwi and Macy both had meets after school and someone needed to be at the house. She said ok. No crying, pouting, arguing, or stomping out of the room saying life is unfair. Just ok. She is thinking about the bigger picture, outside of the Dori bubble. Maybe Pepper and I are doing ok on this parenting stuff after all.

:)